20 Ways To Avoid Being a Sh*tty Driver
Updated: Jul 11, 2022
LISTEN, if you’re experiencing chest tightness before reading this, you’re probably a horrifying driver. When we are navigating these topsy turvy terrains, with thee occasional, uninterrupted smooth cruise, patience and peace should be the focus. Driving should be one of the most patient easy, breezy experiences we consistently do. It’s treated with such impatience, unconditional love, and hostility. What is all this crazy road rage, going to war with traffic and drivers as soon as you get in the car shit? No need to completely lose your mind in your vehicle while driving, people. Chill! Most drivers lack patience, consideration, awareness, and a therapist! Yes, talk to your therapist about how frustrated you are when driving. Get it off your chest! It is as if these real crazed drivers are itching for a fight on these roads. Cruisin’ for a bruisin’.
#TheGoodieJarBlog is aware that in this current time, space, reality, that it is game on, yet some of ya’ll play too much. Especially while driving. Many of you merely look at the car directly in front of you and worry too much about controlling the car behind you when you should be relaxing and scanning all traffic so you can better prepare and navigate. Some of ya’ll apply pressure in traffic, in ways that you haven’t applied any in other areas in your life. Keep that same energy. One thing I know about some of you top shelf drivers, especially your Tesla-ists and Maserati-ists, is…move BITCH! Get outta their way! I’ve personally seen both of those vehicles ruthlessly run people off the road. It is as if they are pissed, they have to drive on the same roads as the Olds Mobil-ists and the GM Saturn-ists. It is ok to get out of the way! Some of you get orgasmic joy when you vehicularly challenge other drivers when they’re doing something you don’t agree with and ask yourself why? Listen, I will swerve into that center lane if it’s available when I see a maniac in my rearview mirror. Nothing against those that love driving slowly and going against traffics natural flow. Just be courteous and go over there! Stop being stubborn, Damn! As soon as you let the real drivers pass, you can continue with that slow shit.
If you remember how to use your breaks every time you get in your car, you certainly remember WTF a turning signal does. Isn’t it crazy how everyone uses their brakes, but refuse to use a turning signal? Or they switch lanes without a signal and then decide to use one after they already commenced with the lane change. Ya’ll weird. I’ve seen some of you use your brakes before switching lanes. That’s not signaling that you’re turning, Bruh! I know you hate using turning signals, but have you ever asked yourself why? Again, this ain’t the time to be playing. Use the signal (Unless one of the slow drivers are acting up and you want to be petty, switch lanes and get in front of them with no signal). The same way you accelerate, you can decelerate! You didn’t know that did ya? Hell yeah! Sometimes breaking for twenty minutes is completely unnecessary. You chronic brakers are crazy. Once again, stop playing. Driving ain’t the time to start checking people. A few of you could benefit from breathing before barreling down the roads. Perhaps you need to give your car sometime to cool down or warm up before taking off. Maybe burn an incense and call on the Ancestors for peace and safe travels. Some of ya’ll need to change the music or whatever you’re listening too. Sa-Roc and Nipsey Hussle will have me way too hype while I’m rolling, might make me run ya’ll off the road, soo I turn on my Lo-fi or Sade playlist.#TheGoodieJarBlog has provided 20 ways to be less of a shitty driver. We’re all just, in the words of Smokey, Huey, and Gwyneth…cruisin’ together! Peace is imperative while functioning, driving, and navigating. It is always ok to safely…move BITCH! Get outta their way!
1. Be patient AF!
3. Don’t get crazy. Tame that driving beast.
4. Stop playing and shit.
5. Why don’t you know how to manage your time? Stop stressing yourself out by leaving at the last minute and then making other drivers suffer because of it.
6. Pay attention. Only thing you should be focused on when driving is what the fuck is going on, on the road.
7. Get a damn phone mount!
8. No unsafe impulsiveness. Take it easy.
9. Know where you’re going! Utilize the damn traffic signs and LISTEN to ya GPS.
10. It’s ok to make a wrong turn, just go around. Enjoy the scenery. No need to cross 5 lanes or abruptly stop in the middle of traffic.
11. Use ya turning signal, wtf? You’re breaking to switch lanes but refuse to signal. You suck.
12. Stop trying to regulate and control how others drive while in motion and keep moving forward. For everyone else, safely move around their unofficial, traffic cop ass.
13. Drive with a purpose, safely, even if it requires speed. Stop all that Daisy shit.
14. The highway is not the streets. You can accelerate, Sir.
15. Stop leaving the ass of ya car in the middle of the street every time you have to make a sudden lane change and straighten that shit out as much as possible. You’re stopping the flow of traffic!
16. Switch lanes with a purpose, it doesn’t have to take five slow motion minutes to get into the next lane, people!
17. You don’t have to madly accelerate in front of someone to switch lanes. You could slow down and switch lanes from the back.
18. Smokey told Deebo, "Get off my ass!" in Friday while breaking into Stanley's house and a lot of you need to keep that line in mind while driving. Back dat ass up a bit!
19. Please DO NOT get blitzed (intoxicated by drinks and drugs) and drive.
20. Be safe AF! Stay alert and stay alive.
Patience, Grasshoppers! I know the word submission is mostly used in reference to Women relinquishing power in romantic relationships and people living in America, however, most of you hate submitting in other areas where it's beneficial, like navigating these streets. Ludacris is my top 3rd favorite MC and he said it best…MOVE BITCH! GET OUT THE WAY, BITCH!